Bad Week

This week was pretty bad for me on a personal level. I had applied for, not one, but two supervisor jobs just before Labor Day, and they just announced their selections on Thursday. I’m currently the lead worker in my unit, and so I thought I had a pretty good chance of getting the job. After all, it’s not much of a step from here to there, and I have got seniority over everyone else that applied. Unfortunately, that’s not how things worked out.

Despite the fact that I trained both of the people who were chosen, and that I have been putting in extra (unpaid!) hours at work in order to make sure that my unit runs smoothly, and as I said before, I have seniority, I wasn’t the right person for either of the jobs. After they made the announcement, I was feeling angry, depressed, ugly, stupid, and most of all, unappreciated. I am tempted to start slacking at work, but in all honesty, I’m just not that kind of guy. When I started putting in extra hours, it wasn’t because they asked me to, but because I need to make sure that the job gets done. When I create a new spreadsheet, database, or reference material, it’s usually not because I’m asked to do so, but because I know that it will make everyone’s job just a little bit easier. And when I spend my own money to bring in treats for my unit (which I did on Monday), it’s because I knew they were going to be stressed (there was a software update over the weekend), and would need something to help them through it.

Maybe the management that made the hiring decision understands that about me and that’s why they felt they didn’t need to give me a promotion. Maybe they thought that they could just continue to take advantage of my strong work ethic and technical expertise in the position that I already have. Maybe they’re right.

Or maybe they just don’t like me very much. I have been known to rub people the wrong way. It happened a lot on Thursday, they day they made the announcement. It seemed like every other person I spoke to thought I was being rude. I apologized, but I don’t know if it made a difference. I hope it was just the stress, but you never know.

In any case, I’m not happy with their choices, and from what I know about the two of them (a lot, since like I said, I trained them), they certainly don’t have the experience or work ethic that I do. So I hope management is happy with their picks, because I have the feeling it’s going to be a disaster. It has happened before, but I won’t get into the details.

So anyway, this weekend I am just staying at home and trying to relax, so hopefully I will be able to deal with the coming week. I finished story 38, which was remarkably apropos for what I was going through. It’s titled Beauty and the Beast, and it’s about an ugly man who meets a gorgeous woman, but because of his physical handicaps he feels that it would be better to just kill himself than even try to be friends with her. Thankfully, she has other ideas.

I got into some deep, dark, depressing thoughts in this story, and I have to admit that I have had those thoughts myself. Especially after last week. But don’t worry about me, gentle reader. I have a loving wife who keeps me grounded, and I have no intention of leaving this mortal coil any sooner than I have to.

Once again, I’m not sure what I’ll be writing about this week, but I’m hoping for something a little more uplifting. I think I would like to write something about overcoming challenges, and making the best of what you’ve got.

We’ll see how that works out next week. See you then!

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Filed under About Me, The Writing Experience

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